One of my reasons for starting a blog is because of my mother’s cancer. I have been continually encouraged as I have experienced the care of the body of Christ. The prayer warriors out that both humble and amaze me. Many people have told me that they want to be informed so that they can pray for my mother, me and my family. And, rather than filling up everyone’s inboxes with emails going to people who want to know and those who don’t, I have decided to update my blog instead.
Earlier with week we received the news that our family doctor reviewed the test results and said that it looked like all of the cancer had been removed. However, the following day my mother’s doctor at the Mayo Clinic told her that he didn’t necessarily agree. There seem to be a few spots that have shown up in one of the scans that need to be investigated a bit. So, she will most likely have a biopsy of her rib and back.
This has been a rollercoaster of emotions.
So, what am I learning?
Waiting is not something I am good at, so I guess I need a lot of practice. I am so thankful that we are confident that the cancer has not spread to her brain or liver. It’s been a long journey of unknowns.
My eyes have been opened to the pain of sickness. I am a whole lot more aware of others who are enduring illness of some sort. I understand the difficulty in accomplishing daily tasks - like eating. My heart aches for those who are walking through terminal illness with someone. I imagine there are moments where you forget that it is the other person who is dieing because your life seems to be ending, too. There have been days when work…well…life…was very difficult because my focus was constantly drifting to the wellbeing of my parents.
I’m also learning about the depth of my relationship with my parents. It is hard to be so far away from home. I want to be there caring for both of them. One of the most difficult things for me has been the thought of my father sitting in the waiting room while my mother - the absolute love of his life - was in surgery. I am so thankful that my brother was able to be with them that day. I have also begun talking to them every night, and I don’t feel guilty for this anymore. They are very special to me, and so I don’t apologize for my need to be highly connected to them during this time. I also - though 1500 miles away - want to experience this with them. It would be easy to distance myself from the pain of this illness, but I don’t want to. If the Lord has placed me here, I want to gain everything I can for myself, for my family, and for my ministry. Difficult circumstances enable us to become stronger…may I not miss this opportunity.
